Speak That Which Cannot Be Spoken

Jafree Ozwald  | Enlightened Beings | March 25 2012

“Why hanker for security? Life is insecure in its very nature, hence it is simple logic: those who want to be more alive, they have to live in insecurity. The greater the insecurity, the more will be your aliveness.” ~Osho

Each one of us naturally carries a deep and sacred clarity about ourselves and our world. We were born with a crystal clear perception of life that has no judgments nor any limiting beliefs. However, through the years this innate understanding became clouded by others judgments, opinions and misperceptions. Habitual thinking patterns soon developed that were embedded with gobs of assumptions, societal beliefs, and countless stories about what limited and powerless human beings we really are. With all of this misunderstanding, the mind could assume that this whole world was unjust, and that human interactions were a constant struggle we all just had to deal with to survive.

The habit of unclear seeing can be so cloudy that you don’t realize you’ve got it. If you feel that you’re in a whirlpool of challenges and have been suffering on any level for weeks or months, you will want to break out of this spinning toilet bowl of limited thinking and simply return to your greatest truth. Your greatest truth is that which liberates you on the deepest level and causes your life to overflow with joy and ease. It is your most natural state of being that has the taste of unbounded freedom! When we can clearly know our truth and feel what is exactly going on within our heart, we become aligned with our soul’s mission and feel a deep aliveness bubbling up from within. The truth brings us into the experience of “divine alignment” with the whole Universe, where every day feels like you’re floating down a fun effortless river made of milk and honey.

My invitation for you today just might be the most radical and challenging task you’ve ever received in your life. The action in itself is one that any child could easily conquer, yet for a mature adult it may bring you down to your knees. Its only for those who want to become unstoppably successful in every area of their lives. If this is you, then read on. If you want to feel totally alive, overflowing with tremendous joy and freedom in this lifetime then give yourself plenty of courage to attempt this mission.

“Look within. Be still. Free from fear and attachment, Know the sweet joy of living in the way. ~Buddha, from the Dhammapada

Yes, be aware, this assignment is not for the halfhearted. It may bring up the greatest amount of fear you’ve ever discovered. Yet, it’s good to know that all fear is simply excitement in disguise. So I hope that you can get excited about this invitation, and see it as special journey in unraveling yourself. I believe that all you’ll need is 15 seconds of courage to complete this assignment, that will shift your life in the most profound ways.

Before I go into explaining the assignment I want you to know why I’m giving this to you. When you follow through with this mission, you’ll discover the most amazing freedom inside you. A freedom that has no boundaries, no limitations and a vast unlimited potentiality. It has nothing to give you but pure ecstasy and bliss! This freedom is not created by thoughts, bound by thoughts, nor liberated through thinking. It is discovered in that timeless space between your thoughts, otherwise known as the “gap” between each word which continues passing through your brain. In between your thoughts is this void, the unknown, the place where pure love, creativity and a divine state of bliss will arise from.

There are many techniques that will enable you to suddenly fall deep into this gap between your thoughts and discover the very source of who and what you are. Yet, many of these techniques have no lasting permanent effect which remain implemented in your daily social life. There however is one technique that I deem as the most powerful of them all, which comes through one simple intention. Speaking about that which cannot be spoken.

What does this mean? How are you to speak something which you cannot say? Inside you there exists a level of information that you are protecting, hiding and keeping secret from the world. You fear that if society found out this information about you, that you would be ruined. This information is protecting your ego from being “found out” where you may become embarrassed to the point of feeling like you should leave the community. The energy around protecting this information is draining and is exactly what you need to let go of. Holding on too tightly to anything in this world will create an energetic wall around your ego, causing you to live a shielded, guarded “un-free” life. Whatever is behind this wall is the sacred secret information which you most need to share.

The one thing that would destroy you in life, is also that which will liberate you. Perhaps its your greatest secret, your biggest fear or that most embarrassing moment of your life. The golden nugget here is to see WHY this tiny piece of insignificant information has become such a big deal for you. Why you have spent so much energy in protecting and hiding it, rather than being liberated from these thoughts and feelings. We really don’t know how small of a cage we are currently living in until we step out into the vast sky. By sharing that which we cannot share, we open the door to become that being who is continuously overflowing with joy, love and laughter like a child.

“He who has realized the Self in the Heart has transcended the dualities and is never perplexed.” ~Ramana

When we no longer are invested in our egos, we don’t spend all this extra mental energy in hiding or avoiding saying things with anyone. When we give up protecting the ego, a tremendous freedom is instantly found. A truly free soul is one who can speak whatever is on their mind with anyone at anytime. They are a walking state of liberation! No matter how trivial their message is, it is the liberty at which their words effortlessly pour out of their mouths which make them so amazing to be with. It is this level of freedom that gives them the power to dive into the deepest depths of their soul.

That which we cannot share, should not share, or feel terrified in letting others know about ourselves, is a big egoic game and hoax. People really don’t care about your secrets. They most likely have their own which are ten times more frightening than yours. When we can dismantle any hesitation around sharing that which we “should” not share, the core ego structure and its walls around the prized identity we were once clinging to come tumbling down. After we share ourselves openly without care, our hidden secrets can fly free into the wind and vast unbounded sky. When the dust from the fear of social ostracization soon settles and we can suddenly see the world through crystal clear eyes… as if it was for the very first time.

As I mentioned, this may be the hardest act of courage you have ever tackled in your life. Yet, no great action went without fear. You will discover a multitude of excuses for avoiding sharing what you cannot share. The ego may make you think this assignment is ridiculous and your reputation is at stake! There are just some things in life that are not meant to be shared. Look at this. Look at what you are defending, protecting and avoiding. The ego is a master at keeping you in prison, and continuing to hide that which keeps you locked up inside. Would you be a greater or lesser person having gone to your grave desperately holding this information back from those who are most intimate with you? You’ll soon find that speaking your truth freely is contagious, as it enlightens the load for everyone in your presence everyday.

Once you start thinking about what information you’re holding back from the world, ponder the idea of what it may feel like to not have to protect it anymore. What would it feel like once your great secret is out, and fully accepted with great compassion by your entire community? It makes you realize how much energy we spend on coping. What a tight, controlled and limited world we often live with on the inside. There is no need for this self-engaged prison. You can choose to be free! Now, I’m not saying that you should shock every person you meet on the street by barfing your darkest deepest secret onto them. What would be the point of that? While that may be a liberating exercise, what I’m pointing you towards today is much more liberating. Its about creating a profound intimacy with those souls you already know.

One great secret is knowing how to start sharing that which you cannot share. Before you say anything to anyone, it’s key that you “set the stage” with your individual listener or audience. This can be done through shifting your tone of voice to a more deep sincere honest quality that prepares them to listen from that depth as well. Then you can start with saying, “I’d like to share something with you that is not easy for me to speak about”. With this one comment you will instigate a heightened level to their listening and the room will instantly get quiet. This creates a momentum to dive deeper within you, where it becomes easier to reveal your deepest truth AND be fully heard.

If your listener is not willing to hear you, there is no reason to speak. If you know you simply cannot reach the minds and hearts of your audience, then remain silent and speak to them in a room by yourself. Yet, if these people truly love you, they will listen as best they can. It’s vital that you learn how to reach out with your feelings and get a sense for where your audience is listening from. How can you say what you’re needing to say in that special way they can understand you? When you learn how to listen to and through your listener’s ears, you speak that message that comes through clearly. By tuning your mind to who is listening you can share from a more confident space and communicate the more subtle aspects of that which cannot be communicated inside you. Radical heart felt communication is about sharing your truth in a way that is received fully. If you aren’t in tune with your audience’s listening, it will feel like you’re talking to a brick wall.

When you’re ready to instigate a radical change in your life, I recommend doing this exercise. Create a Truth Circle! Gather a group of your closest friends or family members into a circle for an hour. Find an object that everyone agrees is to be the sacred talking stick. The stick can be anything from a rock, an egg, an actual stick, or whatever you deem to be the special talking device. Only the person holding the stick has the right to speak and everyone else cannot make commentary, give suggestions, or feedback. The only feedback everyone can give is silence. Give each person 5-10 minutes (depending on the size of the circle) to share that which they cannot share. Place the stick in the middle of the circle and when a person is ready, they must pick it up. Each person holding the stick must spend the entire time speaking as much as they can from their very soul. If there is more silence than words, wonderful! That will give them more initiative to share when the sharing circle happens next week.

Before you begin the circle, talk about the intention of the circle which is to create a deeper quality of honesty, love, truthfulness and friendship between everyone. The support of the circle will as well liberate each individual from their fears and insecurities. Have everyone agree that information shared is sacred and that it will never leave the circle. The reverence for this agreement gives everyone more permission to reveal themselves fully. The silence during sharing time also needs to be held in the most sacred manner, and yet if some people absolutely cannot hold back a small chuckle or laughter that also has to be welcomed and integrated. Laughter can instigate a deeper healing, creating lightness out of what someone deemed a heavy traumatic demon in their mind for decades.

You will be blown away at what happens in your life with this assignment! You, your family and friendships will totally be transformed! By holding a sacred sharing circle on a weekly basis the connections and intimacy will be amazing. The layers of shielding and hiding will in time start falling away, and you’ll discover an entirely new level of inner peace and relaxation with everyone. The inside your being. Imagine a world where everyone you know is included in this level of sharing. Imagine what would happen if your entire community started to participate in their own sharing circles. Everyone around you could openly share their deepest truth without fear. In a few months, you would have a very empowered, whole and healed world around you.

2 thoughts on “Speak That Which Cannot Be Spoken

  1. This is definitely scary, even frightening. I’ve done this exercise in the intimacy of a small group seminar and even then I didn’t share all that I could. To do it with family, … well, that’s taking it to a whole new level. One thing that did come out of the group sharing was the realisation that everyone has at least one deep secret they think will destroy them if it’s revealed. It didn’t, of course.

    1. Hi Ralph! Yes. This can definitely be scary. Family is absolutely the hardest barrier to cross. We agree. Blessings. ~G

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