Michelle Walling, CHLC – This is a lesson I would like to share for the rainbow light warriors. The ego in us tells is that we have done all of the shadow work and that we are fearless, or we wouldn’t be here on Earth at this time. You will truly get a chance to test your true fear level when you come face to face with a “demon” as I did. I think the story I am going to share makes me qualified enough to share how to overcome extreme fear.
I always wanted a galactic representative, my higher self, and/or my guides to appear to me to tell me exactly what is going on and what I should do. One time I asked my team why they didn’t just show up? I then read something or listened to a video that had the answer. The general population would completely panic and freak out if the galactic fleet appeared in the sky just to say hi. The government would try to shoot them down and many people would carry the trauma with them after the incident.
I then pleaded for them to just show up in my living room. I was shown that even though I think I would be able to handle it, since my brain does not have the memory of what my guides/higher self looks like, my body would instantly follow the commands of fight or flight. I would go into a panic mode that would lower my vibration and they would disappear. That’s why only those who have worked on their inner shadows can meet their guidance team within themselves in meditation, unless you get some kind of help or dispensation that allows your fear to be neutralized long enough for an experience with them.
I recently had an experience that proves that FEAR stands up to its name, False Evidence Appearing Real. The details of how I ended up being involved an exorcism are in the article Transmuting Dark Mother Energy. What I did not share in the article is what happened after I went to sleep that night. To preface it, I look back to three dreams I have had. I have rarely had any nightmares since my awakening in 2010. However, the scariest dreams I had recently involved being in the dark.
In one dream I was in what I knew was my father’s house where none of the light switches work, and it was not any of the houses we had lived in. I remember calling out to him to try to find him. It was pitch dark and I couldn’t see a thing. I remember I felt frustrated more than scared, as I felt my way around all of the walls, room by room to try each switch and lamp. In another dream, I remember being in a single room where I am again feeling around all of the walls for all of the light switches and none of them worked. There wasn’t any furniture around the walls and I slid my hands from wall to wall. I remember feeling a bit panicked as to what was happening and what I should do.
The last dream occurred a few months ago. I went to a local state park and rented a cute little log cabin by myself. I had one of those serene evenings sitting on the porch feeding some organic pecans to a pregnant squirrel. When I woke up in the middle of the night I did not feel like I was in a dream, I had full cognizance of myself. I reached over to turn on the lamp by the bedside (that I had just turned off to go to sleep), and it would not work. I tried it several times. I felt something bad in the pit of my stomach. I remember how fast my brain worked as I thought about what to do. I remembered that my cell phone was across the room and I got out of bed an crouched to the floor, crawling over to where my purse was.
In reality, my purse was on the couch, but in the dream, it was for some reason on the floor across the room. I got my purse and felt for my cell phone. Even though I had zero cell service, I was looking for a light. I pushed the button and it was dead. I remember thinking I was in a pitch black room in a cabin and no one knew where to find me. I do not remember what happened after that, but when I woke up later from the dream and turned on the light, I was definitely creeped out enough to end my “camping ‘me’ time weekend” that day.
I told Sonja about my dream and being in complete darkness all alone and she said “how wonderful, you experienced the void”. I remember thinking it was not wonderful at all and I did not think I was in the void, but rather that I was being abducted or something. I remembered a second dream that same night where a man had visited me in the cabin and was briefing me, and left from the front door in daylight. I remember how I felt about him, that I was glad that he was leaving. All I was left with to interpret it was the feeling inside of me that didn’t feel good.
Back to the recent exorcism night. After being a part of an exorcism in my condo as described in the prior article, my friend Sonja and I were extremely tired. Sonja was staying in the guest bedroom after being a guest speaker at a conference that day. I retired to my bedroom, used the bathroom, and went to sleep. Between 2-3 in the morning, I woke to the sound of sand hill cranes cawing. I remember thinking it was weird to hear birds in the middle of the night. I heard Sonja cough and listened for any other sign of movement. It was quiet and I fell back to sleep.
Sometime before dawn, I am guessing around 5:30 am, I woke up and had to go to the bathroom. I remember thinking, should I turn the light on and risk waking up fully or should I pee in the dark and try to go back to sleep? I decided to reach for the light and when I pushed it, there was nothing. I tried both of them and nothing. I had to pee really bad so I sat down on the toilet…and I “fell in”. Someone had left the toilet seat up. I instantly felt fear cursing through my veins. There was no man staying with us in the house and I was the last one to use the bathroom.
All I could do in the moment was finish using the bathroom because my bladder was so full. I was trying to rationalize if I was dreaming again. I knew I was not asleep because in a dream, I am always unable to use the bathroom or I would be peeing in the bed. The fear really revved up in that moment as my heart began beating so hard that I thought I was going to have a panic attack.
I yelled out Sonja’s name. No answer. The greatest fear of all then gripped me. I was thinking there was a man in my house who had cut my electricity off and he had killed Sonja, and I was next. He left the toilet seat up as a signature for me. I finally finished using the bathroom and went straight into Sonja’s room and when I looked at the bed in the dark, it looked like she was not there. I got closer to her and saw her, and although she was just sleeping, she looked dead to me. I pounded her on the chest and said “Sonja!” and she instantly woke up. “What?” she gasped.
I whispered in her ear, “The electricity has been shut off and my toilet seat was up”. It’s all I could say. I was so gripped in fear that I could hardly breathe. It took her a moment to try to understand what I was saying, but as an expert in the illusion she said, “Now wait a minute let’s talk this thing out. Everything is going to be o.k., come lie here next to me”. I crawled into bed next to her like a scared little girl and then whispered into her ear for fear of the man in the house hearing what our plan would be. “I got up to pee and tried to turn on the light, and the electricity is off. I was the last one to use the bathroom and I fell into the toilet. That means there is a man in the house. Should I get my gun? Should I call the police?”
I’ll never forget her answer. “Girl, the police can’t find someone who ain’t there!”
We laid there for a few minutes and I was trying to rationalize what to do. The fear began to subside, although I was still extremely shaken. I wanted to call my boyfriend and ask him to come over, and I was thinking about whether I paid my electric bill. Somehow I ended up getting my phone from my bedroom for a light and checking the breaker, which was conveniently located right there in the hall between Sonja’s room and mine. It was not the breaker. As my mind continued to rationalize, I peeked out of Sonja’s bedroom window and saw that the porch lights were on for my neighbors. We were the only ones without electricity. I called my boyfriend and he could tell I needed him to come over right then, but I did not tell him why. He didn’t even know about the exorcism before we went to sleep.
I laid back down in bed next to Sonja and we talked a few more minutes, and the electricity came on. That made me feel a bit better. All I could think about is whether that man was still in the house. I remembered that my front door was unique, it can only be closed by locking the deadbolt from the inside or by having a key for the outside. There was no lower handle and latch, it was just a dummy handle. If all the doors were locked, he couldn’t physically still be in the house. We checked all of the doors one by one and they were all locked.
I couldn’t check the closets, I had to hand it over to Sonja. As strong as I was, I surrendered to her help. The fact that my toilet seat was up was a direct message for me by a man who was now not real. It was somehow even more terrifying as I could not wrap my mind around what was happening and realized it was a dark illusion playing out. After we checked the whole house for a physical man and it was clear, a few minutes later my boyfriend arrived and I started to calm down even more. The sun came up and we all three talked about it but we didn’t really pinpoint exactly what had happened.
As I look back at it, I remember one thing that stuck out in my mind more than ever that seemed to help me calm down. It wasn’t real.
I knew that I wasn’t dreaming because I was able to pee. I knew that Sonja was right there with me so I was not alone. It was the only thing that kept me from having a complete breakdown.
Even though I have provided multiple articles about the nature of our reality being a hologram and the healing of the inner darkness or shadow self, none of that came to my mind while I was experiencing my worst fears. In the moment, I was more scared about something happening to my friend in my house under my care. I was more afraid of being in the dark and not being able to see my perpetrator than dying. All of these fears were not real were playing out in my mind, projecting into my reality.
I still do not know exactly what happened. I read reports that on that morning, March 4, some people though they felt a “reset”. I thought that was extremely coincidental.
What I can say about how to face your worst fear, or a situation that you find yourself in that takes you into fear is that it is not real. Love is the only thing that is real. The second thing I can offer is that you are never truly alone. In many of my dreams, I was alone and in the dark. That is not true because I am always connected to Source and I have my higher selves and guidance team watching over me. It is the forgetfulness of this matrix and the illusion of separation that causes our human minds to spin our of control with thoughts. The matrix interacts with your mind and creates the reality for you to “see” what is inside of you.
The third thing I can offer is that you are creating your own reality. We are in a holographic matrix that was designed with an artificial intelligence that interacts with your thoughts. I went through a little bit of a phase after this experience thinking that I was crazy. Sonja must be crazy too, as she was right there with me. Once you pierce the veil by creating a situation where you are shown the extreme fear that is unseen, you can better get a grip on the fact that we are truly in a simulated reality. This helps to find that deep shadow within you and to bring light to all that cannot be taken into a higher frequency realm.
When Sonja left my house that day to return home, she took the remnants of the “dark” energy that was in the house with her in order to protect me. She reached out to a friend and transmuted the energy for good once she arrived back home. I was still traumatized for about three days until I was able to identify the energy. Once I was able to identify the source of energy I felt all heaviness leave as if the energy was completely dissipated. Once the illusion is shattered, there can be no more trickery of the mind.
In summary, in order to overcome extreme fear, no matter what the situation, remember:
- It is not real, we are in a holographic matrix,
- You are never alone, call out for help,
- You are creating your own reality,
- You are not crazy, and
- Identifying the energy dissipates it once and for all
Although this article may seem a bit dark, I hope that it helps you to deal with any remaining shadows that you hold within you. The dark energy that caused the situation was brought into my home and matched specific fears I had within me in order to create my reality. As I look back it was such a blessing because it pulled the fears out that cannot be taken into the higher realms.
Write these 5 things down on a sticky note and read them every day, This will re-train your brain and you will not have to be as traumatized if a situation presents itself to you like it did to me.
SF Source How To Exit The Matrix Mar 2018